


Letters I’ll Never Send

by scrvpe



Series: Letters I'll Never Send [1]
Category: creative writing - Fandom, non fandom, non fiction - Fandom
Genre: Breakup, Healing, Hurt, Lesbian, Letter, Moving On, Poetry, Vent Writing, breakup writing, creative writing, letters I'll never send, wlw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2020-12-28 22:46:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21144470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scrvpe/pseuds/scrvpe
Summary: A collection of thoughts I want to send, but never will.





	1. Thoughts

Sometimes I feel as though I need to write. I need to spill out my words and thoughts and feelings.  
I think about you much too often. When the rain hits a certain way, when it thunders, when I see something about you. I think so often about how I could have done things different. How we could have done things different.  
Empty promises and empty words flood my head and my heart. I don’t know how we got to this situation, but we did.  
I know I did something. I do, but I just don’t know what I did.  
I wish I could go back. I wish I could go back to calling you and falling asleep to you reading to me. I wish I could go back to seeing your concentrated face as you did something. I wish I could go back to that night when you told me that the week I was there was the first time you’ve ever felt like yourself.  
I want to know what changed.  
Were you scared? Were you lying? What made you feel as though you needed to run. 

You’re broken.  
You need fixing.  
I came with arms and arms of glue, tape, cement, plaster – but nothing was going to be able to patch you up. You only knew what would fix you and I had to accept that.  
Maybe I was too good to be true.  
Maybe I was too much.  
Maybe I wasn’t enough.  
I don’t know, but I have to accept that I won’t know. 

Even now. Even when every part of myself and those around me are saying I should hate you; I shouldn’t even think of you anymore because you tore down every wall I had and then kicked me when I was defenseless, I can’t.  
I can’t.  
A part of me will always love you just like a part of me will love everyone I have ever loved before.  
Maybe one day you’ll be okay.  
Maybe one day I’ll hear from you again.  
Maybe one day, you’ll be happy like I hope you will be.  
I want you to be happy. 

Thank you for the memories, the good nights, the late-night kisses.  
Thank you for the best adventure in my short 19 years of life.  
One day, I hope I can love someone like I loved you.  
One day, I hope someone loves you just as much as I loved you. 

I’m sure this won’t be the last I will write.  
But at least for now,  
Goodbye.


	2. Next door neighbor

Dear neighbor  
I’m sorry i keep hitting the wall  
My arms are just too long  
And i dont realize it

Your CVS giftcard is coming as soon as i get paid


End file.
